When people are trustworthy with each other, they can relax, knowing that promises will be kept.”“Without trustworthiness, agreements and promises don’t mean anything. Grounding her, taking away privileges, or restricting her access to the phone or computer might be useful consequences for certain situations, however, you must always help her connect the consequences of real life too.
Allow her to have her voice and listen to her, whether the opinions she expresses are about education, career, marriage or other matters. Remember, however, that if your consequence is too harsh, he will focus on his anger and resentment toward you and you will be letting him off the hook simply by accepting his punishment. The most important thing for you to do is to deal calmly with whatever your child owns up to, maintain a positive relationship with him, and to congratulate him for having the courage to tell the truth.Many thanks to Diane Wagenhals of Lakeside Educational Network for some of the material in this article. When your daughter makes a risky choice, you worry about her, not just because she broke a house rule, but also because of the real-world consequences of those choices.
Knowing how to handle her teen years can help you build a loving mother-daughter relationship. Other sources for material covered in this article include:A resource to help parents do the best job they can to raise their children________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Be consistent with your praise and the same with your discipline. You can even be honest with her about why you are trying to communicate in a new way.
Building a relationship of trust with your kids is tough.
Instill Quality Standards. ““People who are trustworthy are known for their determination, reliability and truthfulness. Trust is a concept that we absolutely must teach our children and teens. There are now two problems: one is the taking of the car and the second bigger issue is the breaking of your trust, which is the most important aspect of a healthy relationship.Remember as you deal with issues of trust with your teen that becoming trustworthy:Knowing that teens will most likely break trust with their parents, at least once in a while, helps parents to be more accepting and less upset.
Her whole life, you’ve been instilling values to help her make good choices.
It takes hope away from the teen that he can make amends and re-gain your trust. By being process-oriented in this way, you help her develop critical thinking skills and bolster her ability to solve her own problems.
Give your teen opportunities to build trust. Ask her about the different ways she could handle the situation and what are the possible outcomes. Respect your daughter’s feelings and her opinions. Part of modeling involves keeping your promises, with your child and with others – you are being watched.Since the concept of trust is abstract, you may need to “When you are trustworthy, others can rely on you. She will surprise you with a lot of wisdom and discernment if you give her the chance to figure it out for herself.When your daughter comes to you with a dilemma or conflict she’s facing, focus on how she’s processing information and coming to conclusions.
Then tell her what you'd like her to do better in the future. Helping her develop her abilities and passions will make her resilient and brave as she faces peer pressure and hard choices. Parents need to determine when and how much to re-trust. Other people don’t know if they can believe you.”stop and think before making a promise to be sure he really wants to and can do it.remember what he promises to do and to do the things he promises.keep doing what was promised even when he feels like doing something else.be aware of things that could prevent him from keeping his agreement.
You want to know more about your teen daughter’s life so you can keep her accountable and keep her out of trouble.
When your teenager betrays your trust, one of your jobs is to help him find ways to rebuild that trust. Yes, I said FAILURE!
Just listen, bounce ideas off each other, and help her come to her own conclusions about what to do. […] They help you to maintain perspective and decide how to react to broken trust.